Dear IT department: the Surface Pro is a terrible work laptop and pretty please all I want is a regular laptop

"Textured Soy Protein" (texturedsoyprotein) 09/06/2019 at 15:57 • Filed to: None

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My IT department gave me a Surface Pro when I started back in April. I hate this thing. When it’s plugged into a dock and has a proper monitor, keyboard etc it’s mostly fine, but trying to do any kind of actual work on its own for any amount of time is goddamn irritating. Fuck this piece of shit.

The one problem I have when using the Surface Pro in a dock is that sometimes its graphics drivers go all wonky and the top 1/6 of a window that I try to maximize on one of my external monitors disappears, and I have to google what the fuck the keyboard shortcut to un-maximize but not minimize a window is, then unplug the thing from the dock, then re-plug it to the dock, and this fix only works like half the time.

The main problem with the Surface Pro is I have zero use for a tablet in a work context. I do have use for a laptop. I just want something with a good keyboard and a nice screen so when I go to a meeting and continue my work interrupted, or if I work from home I can plop it on my lap.

How is it for going to meetings? Terrible.

Something about Windows and especially Office is terrible at resizing things when unplugging from an external monitor. Outlook goes totally haywire and I have to close it and reopen it for it to work.

Something about the wifi adapter is straight up broken. Half the time if I unplug it from the dock, which has an ethernet connection, it won’t connect to wifi at all. It can find networks but won’t actually go online, unless I reboot, and that means if I undock and go to a meeting with all my stuff still open, but can’t get on wifi, then I need to close everything down, reboot, and reopen everything.

This stupid flippity floopity not-actually-a-laptop keyboard combined with a kickstand is okay at best for propping up the Surface Pro on a flat surface like someone else’s desk, or a conference table. I can type reasonably quickly on it but that’s because I’m a fast typer in general on pretty much any keyboard.

What about working from home?

Putting the Surface Pro on a lap is fucking garbage. On top of that, there’s no keyboard backlight. We keep the house relatively dim because my wife is sensitive to light. All our lights have the dimmest possible bulbs in them. Gimme my damn keyboard backlight! (EDIT: Ok, so apparently there IS a keyboard backlight and mine was just turned off. But still, using the flippy floopy Surface keyboard on a lap is shitty.)

The screen is high resolution but the colors and contrast suck. I have to crank the brightness way too high to make it visible but then it sears my retinas with too much white.

Positives:

It’s light weight so I can hold it like a paper notebook while walking around the office. Of course, I am a large muscular individual who spends an inordinate amount of time in the gym so I am also capable of carrying a laptop.

It has a pen, for doing pen things, which I don’t do at all. The only pen thing I do is periodically lose it because the magnet that attaches the pen to the side of the Surface Pro isn’t powerful enough and it either gets knocked off inside my bag or knocked off while I’m moving the thing around. I gave up on keeping the pen attached. It lives in a drawer now.

The speakers are kinda good, but who gives a shit?

I don’t know how the hell Microsoft and whatever other tech vendors convinced IT departments everywhere that they should spend all this money on Surface Pros instead of regular laptops. My company is so far along with the Surfaces that I don’t think there are any decent regular laptops and their accompanying docks still in circulation where I’d have an alternative.

But man, I hate this stupid thing. Its light weight makes it ve ry tempting to fling across the room with disdain, except for the whole me not owning it problem.

MKULTRA1982(ConCrustyBrick) > Textured Soy Protein 09/06/2019 at 16:06

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The high schools in my school board give each new student a chrome book that they have the option of buying when they graduate. Maybe to resist the urge to frisbee yours you could stick some fridge magnets to it? Leave it on top of the microwave when you use it? 

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > Textured Soy Protein 09/06/2019 at 16:14

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I work as a teacher and I provide all my own equipment just so that I can service it as I see fit. All my own equipment.

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > MKULTRA1982(ConCrustyBrick) 09/06/2019 at 16:15

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Depending upon what you’re doing with them, Chromebooks can be great. They certainly work well in my 7th/8th grade classroom...

Textured Soy Protein > MKULTRA1982(ConCrustyBrick) 09/06/2019 at 16:22

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My wife has a Chromebook. They’re good and fine for a computer to use at home if you don’t do any heavy lifting like photo/video editing or hosting a Plex or other similar media server. I wouldn’t want one as a work laptop in a Microsoft environment though.

MKULTRA1982(ConCrustyBrick) > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 09/06/2019 at 16:22

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Oh no I didn’t mean to give the impression they are bad, or worse than the surface. I meant that the high school class is better equipped than our friend. I’m glad the students get them, I think they’re a great tool and they (I would hope) level the playing field for less fortunate kids. I’ve also only heard good things from teachers/educators I’ve spoken to about them 

ttyymmnn > Textured Soy Protein 09/06/2019 at 16:24

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Sounds like you’re trying to drive a nail with a crescent wrench. My family was gifted an iPad and a rugged keyboard case. For something to take notes on while I’m teaching, it’s absolutely perfect, so I don’t have to drag my big laptop around. But I would never use it at home. 

ttyymmnn > Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo 09/06/2019 at 16:26

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We got our oldest (who turned 17 yesterday, btw) a Chromebook when he started high school. He uses it all the time, and really likes it. Since the whole district has sold their collective should to Google, everything works relatively seamlessly. I personally wouldn’t want to use one on a daily basis, but it all depends on the job you are trying to do. 

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > MKULTRA1982(ConCrustyBrick) 09/06/2019 at 16:28

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I didn’t take your remark that way at all. 

Textured Soy Protein > ttyymmnn 09/06/2019 at 16:28

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That’s the thing, it’s not suited for my use and I didn’t ask for it in the first place. It lives most of its life docked on my desk but when it’s not on my desk I need a decently large and legible screen, plus a good keyboard. If I’m in a meeting and I need to pull reports from my recruiting database, or view spreadsheets, or find some email in Outlook, the Surface sucks at that. If I want to use it at home chilling on the couch, the Surface sucks at that too. 

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > Textured Soy Protein 09/06/2019 at 16:29

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Only one thing to do - rebel and start writing all your meeting notes in shorthand with a stylus using a “crayon” effect. Offer to provide them to people.

Textured Soy Protein > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht 09/06/2019 at 16:32

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I have a bi-weekly meeting with the C-suite where I have to provide minutes afterward. Something tells me this strategy would be less than advantageous to my bonus and raise potential.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > Textured Soy Protein 09/06/2019 at 16:33

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Hilarious (once) but suboptimal. Got it.

jminer > Textured Soy Protein 09/06/2019 at 16:35

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My work gave them out for a while but got so many complaints they stopped offering them.

I’ve doled them out as an admin before for some users, but only specific ones. It’s a neat piece of hardware but only for specific use cases.

My main machine is a x360 HP that does pretty damn well.  It has an i7, is light as hell and a battery that lasts 6 hours with moderate workloads.

AestheticsInMotion > Textured Soy Protein 09/06/2019 at 16:53

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Any chance of getting comped for a decent laptop? 

Textured Soy Protein > jminer 09/06/2019 at 17:02

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My dad and sister both have HP x360 something or others. Dad’s is from work. First they offered him a Surface Pro which he vetoed , then they gave him a Surface Book which he tried but hated, so he ended up with this. But he’s the CEO so he can do that.

My sister bought hers on her own. She had a perfectly good regular laptop but when she went to business school at UNC they required a Surface or other convertible laptop. Don’t ask me why they have that stupid-ass requirement but whatever.

I have an old Macbook Pro 13 that I got 5 years ago and is still trucking along totally fine.

For work I really don’t need anything fancy. All I want is a 13-14" laptop with a halfway decent CPU, 8 GB or more RAM, 1080p or better screen that’s actually good to look at, backlit keyboard, thunderbolt 3 port for 1-plug docking without a proprietary dock, and hopefully 3 lbs or less weight. I’d be perfectly happy with something like this  even though it’s a bit over 3 lbs because it has a 14" screen.

Textured Soy Protein > AestheticsInMotion 09/06/2019 at 17:04

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Best I can hope for is to ask if they have any regular laptops already in house. While I am in charge of my particular function I’m not quite high enough up the food chain to ask them to spend money on me when I have a functioning computer, even if I hate the thing. 

nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul > Textured Soy Protein 09/06/2019 at 17:11

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I converted my department over from iPads to Surface Go's and have been getting rave reviews. Mostly because they have 4G built in and we utilize AnyDesk for remoting into various consoles. (now my biggest gripe is that AnyDesk won't trigger the on screen keyboard so you have to keep the windows OSK on your taskbar. Minor issue but our extended typing is limited). Shame your having issues with yours so - some of the issues sound like they may be manufacturer defect. 

Rusty Vandura - www.tinyurl.com/keepoppo > ttyymmnn 09/06/2019 at 17:17

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Yes, I remembered that, and was wondering when I made the comment how that was working out. For high school students, they’re great. For Photoshop and Finale , not so much. Nor Illustrator...

mwatson2 > Textured Soy Protein 09/06/2019 at 17:17

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I hate mine as well. It overheats and sounds like a jet engine. I’ve had to do more hacks to the damn thing to keep it running which includes a USB fan to keep it cool. Unplugged, I’m lucky to get two hours of battery life unless I turn my processor down (what’s the point). I love the dock, but I have a similar issue where 50% of the time it completely fails to manage screen resolution.

I had a surface book for a while at another job and loved it.

Im curious about the surface laptop as well.

facw > Textured Soy Protein 09/06/2019 at 17:18

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I really wish my company would offer a laptop stipend and just let me pick whatever I wanted. Alternatively, at least let me pick from some options, one-size-fits-all really doesn’t work, different jobs have different needs, even supporting a single laptop is easier for IT. If you are doing a single model deployment it really needs to be something quite good (X1 Carbon or something). Currently I’m on an old Thinkpad X-Series (with horrible low resolution), and while I’m due for an upgrade next month, it will probably be something significantly shitier (though at least with a 1080p s cr een), and I really don’t want to bother with a non-ultraportable.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Textured Soy Protein 09/06/2019 at 17:20

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Yeah a coworker had one and hated it so bad it got accidentally dropped. 

Textured Soy Protein > nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul 09/06/2019 at 17:21

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Defects aside, the form factor just doesn’t work for me. I gain nothing from having a touch screen or a pen or a couple pounds less in my bag that outweighs a good 13-14" screen and full-size laptop keyboard and trackpad. 

Textured Soy Protein > mwatson2 09/06/2019 at 17:22

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Mine sometimes makes a sound that sounds like a spinning hard drive that I think is the fan grinding on dirt or something. 

Textured Soy Protein > facw 09/06/2019 at 17:23

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I totally get them wanting to limit the different number of things they’re managing, but I’d be thrilled if they had a plain old regular laptop option. 

nFamousCJ - Keeper of Stringbean, Gengars and a Deezul > Textured Soy Protein 09/06/2019 at 17:32

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I guess tthey have their place. For me if I'm out in the field there's often no place for me to put my laptop down to even use the track pad so the touchscreen and pen are worth it. 

facw > Textured Soy Protein 09/06/2019 at 17:37

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I think I’d want to offer at least four laptop choices (which might not be offered to everyone but could be with manager approval):

Some general purpose thing, maybe even a Chromebook

A powerhouse machine for people who need high performance and can live with size/weight compromises

An ultraportable

Some type of tablet/2-in-1 solution for those embracing that mode

None of those four is great for everyone, but even if you can only support 3 of the 4, you probably will be able to offer everyone something that works reasonably well for their use.

promoted by the color red > Textured Soy Protein 09/06/2019 at 18:26

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Did your IT department install any monitoring/security software? My work laptop should be relatively fast: 6th-gen i5 and 8GB RAM but it’s so bloated with all that shit that it struggles to run Office or boot to desktop in any reasonable length of time. 

Montalvo > Textured Soy Protein 09/06/2019 at 18:29

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My current laptop hit the sweetspot in terms of size, weight and performance. Got it a couple of years ago and it hasn’t disappointed. When it is tike for a replacement I will be looking for something similar. At work I have a tower but I would prefer to have my personal laptop instead.

https://www.gigabyte.com/us/Laptop/AERO-14—GTX-1060/sp#sp

14" 1440p screen, full fledged GTX 1060, just over 4 pounds.

Textured Soy Protein > promoted by the color red 09/06/2019 at 19:35

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Nothing like that. Performance is decent enough, well, except for the display and wifi issues. I just hate the form factor.

2Fast2Furious: Rotary Powered > Textured Soy Protein 09/06/2019 at 21:34

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while I usually prefer the surface to the apple equivalent because of the cost and the fact the surface runs win10 over a mobile based os like ios on the ipads, i would rather have a more mechanical keyboard and have enjoyed the few minutes I’ ve spent with display surface laptop models, all things aside I’ m too poor to consider buying any surface models anyway and just have a cheapo chromebook, which is a mobile OS based, but it does have the added benefit of not being resource intensive like windows so the low specs are garbage.  

MackMario > facw 09/06/2019 at 21:39

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My company actually  does this. Though certain managers will only approve the low end craptops.

Eric @ opposite-lock.com > Textured Soy Protein 09/07/2019 at 01:42

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My manager has one of those and hasn’t complained about it. The Book version is far more practical, IMHO. It’ll also readily run all day without being plugged in, to the point that I often forget to plug it in, except when I plug it into my   dock at home. It can do roughly 1.5 typical work days of mobile usage, which is pretty crazy.

Anonymous > Textured Soy Protein 09/07/2019 at 11:32

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What kind of old ass surface are you using? The first 1? My surface has none of your  problems, mine is working perfectly, the surface is a great laptop.

Jdawgnoonan > Textured Soy Protein 09/08/2019 at 11:27

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I agree overall. My Surface Pro is the glitchiest machine that I have ever used. Besides the issues that you mentioned, mine also chooses to switch to Tablet Mode every time when I dock it, which is the opposite of what it should do. That, and it frequently loses the monitors connected to the dock, so then I have to undock and re-dock it, which once again causes it to go into tablet mode. The annoyances are not worth it. And the thermal throttling slows it down at the oddest times and makes it behave like a 10 year old taxed machine.